Fatherhood

Recently I was reminded of the importance of the father's role in developing their children's identities. In conversation with a co-worker the other day he shared with me an excerpt from a book that he has been reading which states that children receive their identities through their fathers while they receive nurturing and compassion from their mothers. I guess I could say that I have known this for some time down in the recesses of my heart but I have not been relating to my children accordingly. The book states that daughters want to know that their beautiful and that they look to their fathers for that affirmation. It also states that sons want to know who they are and that they "learn" that primarily from their fathers as well. Having come from a fatherless home I can personally attest to this truth. I spent most of my adolescent years doing everything I could to find my "place", to find out who I was. That pursuit has had some very regrettable consequences but in the end I can't say that I would do anything differently. Nevertheless, I don't want my children to have to go through the same journey of trial and error if they don't have to. I have now determined to remind Anna each and every day through my words and actions that she is beautiful, both inside and out, to show her that she is lovely and desirable and to give to her an example of how the men in her future are to treat her. I have also determined to live in the conscious reality that Micaiah is constantly watching me to figure out for himself what it means to be a man, to be a son, a husband and ultimately a father. I must admit that the sobriety of this responsibility is great, yet the joy of it is far greater.